I DO … Now What? (Week #4)

05 Oct

Hey folks,

Here are some of the notes form last Sunday’s “I DO…Now What?” class.

Hope they are helpful!

Margie and Hixon

2 Cor. 5:14-21
… 17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:[a] The old has gone, the new is here! 18 All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: 19 that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation

If God has given Christians the message of Reconciliation, then that message must first be lived out at home and in our marriages.
Simple Definition of RECONCILIATION: “the act of causing two people or groups to become friendly again after an argument or disagreement”.

Reconciliation works best as a LIFESTYLE and not just a response when things go badly.

  • Since you are a sinner who married a sinner…one of your will always lean towards being thoughtless, calloused, insensitive, selfish, arrogant, disloyal, …well….a sinner.
  • KEY: If you are going to have a marriage that lives in unity, understanding, commitment etc…. then you must have a “little moments” approach.
  • If marriages die by 1000 small cuts, then they also heal by 1000 small “healing”
    • How do you lose weight? Moment by moment
    • How do you train for a marathon? Every day
    • How do you save for retirement? Slowly over time.
    • “Success is doing the right thing for a long period of time”
    • Not huge moment to huge moments….think about it. In 27 years of marriage margie and I have had probably 6-7 huge,life changing moments in our marriage. Most of it is just day to day.


“The Character of a Marriage is formed in 100’s of daily, mundane moments and revealed in the intense blessings and storms of life”

You can have a great marriage, but you must understand that a good marriage is not a mysterious gift. No, it is, rather, a set of commitments that forges itself into a moment by moment lifestyle.

  1. Must life in your marriage with a HARVEST mentality. – Gal 6:7 – “reap what you sow” . Scariest verse in scripture…. most of us thankfully will not rep what we sow because of grace but there is a CAUSE AND EFFECT…

2 Corinthians 9:6
Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously.

Very day you harvest “relationship plants” that spring from the seeds you have planted moments, days, months or even years ago. .

  • If you plant kindness you will eventually reap warmth
  • ….plant critique reap distance and coolness
  • ….plant prayer reap faith
  • ….plant insults reap bitterness
  • ….plant forgiveness reap closeness
  • etc….

2. Must live in your marriage with an INVESTMENT mentality.

Matt 6:19-33.  “… but store up for yourself treasures in heaven…”

“We all live to gain, maintain, keep and enjoy things that are valuable to us. SO what is really valuable to you?  Your marriage? Your position at work? Your kids? Your recreation and entertainment? Your…self? It will be reflected in what you INVEST in.”

3. Must live in your Marriage with a GRACE mentality

NOTE: The central theme of the Bible is not to impart a certain set of God-revealed principles that allow us to live a God honoring life….the central theme of scripture is a person. JESUS. (if principles then no need for Jesus)

Most of us have gotten good enough at being a church member that we start to rank ourselves. While we would never say it, we certainly live by the idea that we are “better at Jesus” than other people. That is ridiculous!

Where a marriage gets good is when both husband an wife know that they have been forgiven soooooo much that they must extend the same grace to their spouse.

See ya this Sunday at Hyde Park!


Week #4 Concept Credit to Paul David Tripp – “What Did You Expect?” 2010


Posted by on October 5, 2016 in Family, Marriage


2 responses to “I DO … Now What? (Week #4)

  1. Ken Carter

    October 5, 2016 at 8:17 am

    Hixon, do you have this whole series in book form? Ken Carter

    On Wed, Oct 5, 2016 at 8:58 AM, I N T E N T I O N A L Marriage wrote:

    > Hixon and Margie Frank posted: “Hey folks, Here are some of the notes form > last Sunday’s “I DO…Now What?” class. Hope they are helpful! Margie and > Hixon MARRIAGE OF RECONCILIATION 2 Cor. 5:14-21 … 17 Therefore, if anyone > is in Christ, the new creation has come:[a] The old has gone, ” >

    • Hixon and Margie Frank

      October 5, 2016 at 8:41 am

      Hey Ken!
      It’s not published yet but we hope to have it ready for Fall 2017. Ya think it may Be helpful for couples?


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